Bite-Size

Sete Lagoan:

Luis Suarez has reportedly signed an advertising campaign with a multinational company which makes FMCG products. This move has been catalyzed by the incident which took place during the second half of the Italy vs Uruguay group game in the FIFA World Cup. Uruguay later went on to win the game and the Azzurri were knocked out of the competition.

Luis Suarez allegedly bit Italian defender Giorgio Chellini during the second, but escaped without even a card. There has been a massive uproar on platforms like Twitter, and FIFA is said to be looking into the matter. There are some reports which say that Suarez should be banned for a year in order to tackle his anger issues.

 

Credits: usmagazine.com

On the other hand, the unnamed corporation has capitalized on this issue and has offered the Uruguayan forward an advertising deal which shall make him the most valued sports player in the world. Suarez was unavailable for comment due to a practice biting session.

The Uruguayan coach has denied commenting on the incident but has said that Suarez is one of the best players in the world and deserves credit for his attacking game. Another member of the Uruguayan management has said that this is a new offensive defensive strategy to undermine the opposite defense.

The company spokesperson told us in a special interview that Suarez will be modeling for their dental and hair products.

“Suarez was seen holding his teeth after the biting incident, and the world has seen that he has teeth and gum problems. Suarez will display this pain on every television screen and later our toothpaste shall make the pain in his teeth vanish. (This will also be seen when he next bites a player and dedicates it to our toothpaste on the football field.)

“He will also lead our shampoo campaign in which he will be head butting a referee, as he did when he was 16. His hairstyle hadn’t changed even after that incident and there wasn’t a single dot of dandruff or fallen hair on the referee’s uniform. This will be credited to our shampoo and hair gel.”

Meanwhile, Ashish Nehra has been spotted crying in his house. There is speculation that this is because he has been unable to put his larger-than-Suarez front teeth to proper use like the Uruguayan attacker.

PS: This post is just for entertainment purposes and is not supposed to harm any religious, political, Liverpool FC or Uruguayan sentiments.

All In Or Nothing

There I lay alone,

In the middle of the night,

As the clock ticked,

Slow as a snail,

When she asked,

A difficult riddle,

With my anger that did fiddle,

And all I said was…

Treading you are,

On dangerous grounds,

Isn’t answered by words,

What you ask,

But by heart truly,

Which says out aloud.

Football is life,

The eternal love,

Football is peace,

The equal white dove.

Football runs through,

It’s in the blood,

Football is forever,

From the blooming flower,

To even the tiniest bud.

Football is religion,

It makes us all one,

Football is everywhere,

And it leaves out none.

Football is fun,

Played and even when seen,

Football resides in all,

It’s just hidden within.

It’s just not a game,

And it’s never about fame,

Football is everything,

So it’s all in or nothing.

She didn’t reply,

And I just laughed,

I stole this heartily,

I framed it readily,

Though she didn’t understand,

Not a word comprehend,

She smiled and agreed,

That football was it all.

The friend in question who inspired me to do this post is a fellow blogger, Aayesha. Thank you for asking me this, and giving me the push.

Foul or Folly?

As the ball came in, he felt a slight nudge, and a sly idea popped into his mind.

As he went down dramatically, the whistle blew and the card rose into the air.

The men in red and white protested as he feigned pain in his ankle.

Yellow triumphed.

Master-class acting or just bad refereeing?

This is written on the disputed penalty decision by the Japanese referee in the opening game of FIFA World Cup 2014.

Photo Credits: Goal.com

WC 2014

pride and honor staked

biggest event of the year

kick-off tomorrow

Pitter Patter

Pitter patter,

Pitter patter,

There I fall to the ground,

A few drops at first,

And then a cloud burst,

Yeah, I am Earth bound.

Rumble groan,

Rumble groan,

They collide and bring darkness,

Few flashes,

Yet many clashes,

It’s a war succeeded by freshness.

Splish splash,

Splish splash,

Puddles dance with the feet,

Tiny footballers enter,

While their mother’s deter,

It’s time to beat the heat.

Whiz whoosh,

Whiz whoosh,

My friend blows me kisses,

Trees dance,

In the pressured trance,

As the wind just hisses.

Boom thud,

Boom thud,

The battle goes on,

The sun tries to shine,

Though the sky is now mine,

And someone is thus born.

Aww wow,

Aww wow,

He takes centre stage,

7 coming together,

Its new altogether,

Vivid it is and not dull beige.

Chirp chirp,

Chirp chirp,

Birds cry out loud,

I walk away,

As the trees minutely sway,

And my friends look at me- proud.

Sniff sniff,

Sniff sniff,

It’s the fragrance of wet soil,

Also the bacteria at work,

To give a cough, and a jerk,

Drinking water now needs a boil.

Brr brr,

Brr brr,

The wind whistles past,

It’s quite chilled,

Though you won’t get billed,

But it won’t as much last.

Yippee wooh,

Yippee wooh,

That’s the nutty author,

This nursery rhyme,

Is to sing with a chime,

And not to worry- bother.

Thwack slap,

Thwack slap,

The hand hits the cheek,

It’s the editor,

Who found the rhyme too bitter,

So now the poet’s running meek.