Wednesday, April 16, 2014

Xposure

My basic plan this time was to take some of Hollywood and to thrash that up. With half a post done, I came across this soon-to-come masterpiece being made by Bollywood. Bollywood, you never disappoint me, do you?

This awesome film has completely amazed me even before its release. I apologize for calling the Roshans the biggest and most efficient copycats of Bollywood with Krish 3, but I now have someone to replace them. The best copy award goes to the stalwart, the all rounder of Bollywood, Mr. Himesh ‘Nosey’ Reshamiya.

I need to interrupt this post right here to give you some news. Leonardo DiCaprio has just passed away. The creators of the Nirma ad, Super Lyricist Gulzar Sahab, and Rap God Eminem have all decided to leave the world in order to get enlightened about making songs from the Great Gods. The reasons behind this decision and the premature death are still coming in from around the globe.

We have confirmed that Leo’s death was caused by seeing some posters and the start of the trailer of ‘The Xpose’. There is speculation that these were so awesome that Leo felt the need to walk away from the world at that moment. Some more news coming in! The Oscar Jury has given an Oscar to a Bollywood movie, that to in the middle of the year, in the category of Best Cheap Copy Film of the year. The Oscar Jury was not available for comment on this decision, and Himesh Reshamiya has been spotted holding the Lady high and dancing while Yo Yo Honey Singh has decided to use some English in his next song.

Mere jaisa baby yahan koi nahi,
Mujhe pata hai tu kal soi nahi,
Sabko pata hai tujhe ho gaya love,
Sachi bata de ho gaya kab.

No. Do not misunderstand me. I’m not trying to flirt, nor am I trying to undermine readers by behaving cheaply. If you felt bad, then please check out Ice Cream! The summer offers on ice cream have come and the grand offer is: Have an Ice Cream and get a chance to travel to Kashmir! Amul and Havmor have attached a clause at the end which says that the person needs to hear the Ice Cream song from The Xpose to the last bar in order to travel to Kashmir, but local ice cream sellers have shut down their shops after they heard this line being sung in a song.

I’m just drifting away from the topic. Returning back to what I had begun, I must say that before 2 States and any of the movies which are going to release in the vacations, I have decided that I will be seeing The Xpose first day, first show.

So, The Xpose. Releasing on 23rd May, this movie is about exposure. Not the bad kind, but the kind which is embarrassing. I did not wish to read the plot once I saw the trailer and the posters. No, they aren’t that bad, it’s just that I want to hold the suspense for myself. The Xpose exposes the levels to which Bollywood can fall to. This film takes everything as an inspiration, and that is the USP.

The poster and the original
From the posters, to the songs, to some specific shots; this is what is inspired in the film. I must applaud at the thoughts of the creation team (if there was one), on being so original about it.
  
A still
The new dimension of copying is visible in the trailer too as it is somewhat completely similar from The Great Gatsby.

Leo has been taken up by Himesh ‘Nosey’ Reshamiya, so it’s no wonder that Leo’s heart stopped on seeing the mere first shot. The shock of not getting an Oscar for Wolf Of Wall Street and now this top notch news brought together and added to take Leo away from this world of ours. Let’s hold a 2 minute silence for the great star.

The songs have been copied quite nakedly and without a drop of shame falling on the floor. Be it old or new, the copying has been done alike, and the old lyricists and music directors would surely wish to curse bless Himesh for making their songs more awesome. In order to get a hit finally, Himesh has also copied songs from the Aashiqui 2 album, the Nirma song, Dhan Te Nan of Kaminey, and the title track of Cash, whose music matched the tune at the start of Pulp Fiction.
#MotherOfCopying

Honest creators from Bollywood have all decided to keep quiet on this issue. At the same time, Himesh has fallen into the Oscar winning hangover and he is currently on a spree of watching movies to copy from. Yo Yo Honey Singh has gone back to his studio with a dictionary in hand and it is thought that he may come up with an English rap the next time. There could also be the inclusion of Nimbu Paani due to the hot summer and the current use of ice cream.

All I want to say is: Kya baat, kya baat, kya baat.

Copy kiya hai isne, par nahi khayega yeh gaali,
Banda hai yeh apna, iske liye zara thoko taali.

Just go through this video which acted as a catalyst to make me write this piece.


Do send in your condolences for all the great men whose hard work has just been destroyed by typing in the comment box below.

14 comments:

  1. ROFL-arious brother :) And that's all I'll say. Xpose, my foot!

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    1. Thank you Sid...:)
      And I must say that this was real quick...;)

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  2. I never miss Himmi s movies. All i do is laugh my guts out at his guts to be an actor and the courage to disgrace himself. Ta tana na na na na tandoori nights. My gosh...

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    1. That was another disaster :P
      And well said Sir :D :)

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  3. hahaha really hilarious review. i love your style of writing. This movie "The Expose" will be epic!! What does it mean anyway or should we just feel our brains out?

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    1. Glad you liked it Ma'am..:)
      Its going to be so bad, that it will be awesome..:P

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  4. The post clearly tells how disgusted you are with this.. I agree..

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  5. :D Kya baat! kya baat! kya baat! I am coming with you for the first day first show! :D

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  6. hhahaaha.. Heelaaayriousss... Poor Leo. Oh, my poor poor Leo. Do watch the movie please. And the reviews should follow, please.. for sake of humanity.. please do a review on this film :D :D

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  7. Inspired they say! Why do Bollywood directors need to get inspired!? Why? End of originality, I suppose! Nice pun, Karan! :D

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    1. Copying is their only inspiration...as they have shown in recent times :P

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